Cha-Nese's Suggestion

On behalf of Cha-Nese Peterson I have decided to make a blog. She said I'd be a good "alternative journalist" and all that made me think of are those idiots who write for free newspapers funded by rampant local prostitution. They don't relay any factual information, just a bunch of bullshit opinions.

The truth is I already have two blogs, but I guess I need another one in order to suck just a little more.

I named the blog "Jesus Pescado." Please note that the name "Jesus" shall be pronounced "Hey-Zues" and "Pescado" shall be pronounced "Pess-Kah-Do." It sounds like a delicious martial art. So check in as frequently as possible and you'll recieve discipline in mind, body and spirit, even if it's been a while since the last update.

I have a few more lines I can fill so I'll give you all some advice and candid information that may prove beneficial in years to come.

1. OCAD (Ontario College of Art and Design) is really gay. Like faggy gay. Not like it's exclusively for homosexuals but it sucks proverbial dick. On the contrary, they don't teach people to write for shitty free newspapers funded by rampant local prostitution.

2. In order to communicate instantaneously, fish use a sophisticated computerized network known as "sea-mail."

3. Check out THEO'S PAGE OF GLOCKS AND HOW MUCH Y'ALL SUCK at www.angelfire.com/biz4/yallsuck This is probably the best thing still on the 'net since 1996.

4. For the ladies: when you are trying to please your man, it's a lot "foxier" if you have a hat on. It's like, "How did she get so naked without taking off the hat?" Or, "Is she worried about the sun getting in her eyes?" Either way, it adds an element of mystery to your lovemaking men find IRRESISTABLE.

Well there you have it. I'll be on my way now, but thanks for droppin' by!

Your pal,

John